Today’s lesson: don’t let the internet scare you.
Another day, another internet scare. This time it’s about that homemade slime, and all the toxins and poisons in it—the ones that are pretty much killing our kids. Except there aren’t any toxins, and kids aren’t getting sick.
This rumor started with an article from the Daily Mail, a British “newspaper” that Wikipedia has deemed “generally unreliable.” In the fine tradition of crappy supermarket tabloids, the Daily Mail is on a par with the National Enquirer, the Star, the Sun, and Weekly World News – it’s a site that makes stuff up, or blows things crazy out of proportion to sell newspapers. Admit it – you were tempted to buy that cheap paper that proclaimed that Hillary was from Venus, or that there’s a Miracle Cream that Allows People to Grow a Sixth Toe. The story was amplified by a blog post at “This talk ain’t cheap”, where the author points out in the second sentence that she’s “not a doctor or a scientist or a chemist.”
As is the manner of clickbait about things hurting children, this one has been posted -n- reposted on Facebook and parenting blogs. In an effort to make sure the barn door is firmly bolted shut now that the horses are long gone, let me give you the quick version: there’s nothing in homemade slime that’s likely to hurt anyone, as long as it’s “used as directed.” Don’t eat the stuff, rub it in your eyes, or lie in a bathtub of it for an hour. Other than that, it’s safe.
We’ve still got an unopened box of borax and bottles of glue downstairs from my youngest’s “slime phase” last year. You mix up a bunch of chemicals (See! Chemicals! That’s your first warning, right there!!) to make a sort of gooey, hand-clinging, squishy mess. It even makes comical sounds when you squarsh it around between your hands. Harmless fun?
The Daily Mail article focuses on one ingredient in homemade slime, pointing out that boric acid (Borax) is labeled by the European Chemicals Agency as ‘toxic to reproduction’, and potentially irritating to eyes and lungs. The box in my basement says those things, too. Don’t eat it, and don’t rub it in your eyes, and don’t stick your face in the box and whiff it. If your children are too young to handle this on their own, they probably shouldn’t be making slime without supervision. Apart from the breathless and frightening tone, the Daily Mail’s critique of Borax is at least reasonably close to the truth. It’s conceivable that an unsupervised or particularly reckless child could get hurt by the stuff. It’s also possible that some kids could have more-sensitive skin, and could end up with a rash or the itchies (do I need to say: if your child gets irritated skin after playing with slime, he or she should stop playing with slime. The same is true if your child gets itchy skin after petting a cat or eating finger-fuls of cookie dough.)
But the blog post goes a step further, heading off the rails of the worry train. The blogger points out imaginary dangers of other ingredients, like glue. She says white glue—essentially, Elmer’s—can cause anxiety, convulsions, seizures (both convulsions AND seizures!), respiratory failure, and loss of appetite. Except none of this is true. In the manner of googlers-who-call-themselves-researchers everywhere, the author mistakes one kind of glue for another. Elmer’s white glue causes sticky hands, but is otherwise non toxic. What she’s quoting are side effects of huffing industrial glue or model cement, which is a different product entirely, and is not an ingredient in homemade slime.
There’s also shaving cream – which the blogger implies contains carcinogens and “very controversial” ingredients. I think of it as something people rub on their faces (men, typically), legs (often women), or all over the walls of the shower (children). If you’re afraid of your children touching shaving cream, I cannot help you.
By the way, homemade slime also contains water (AKA deadly dihydrogen monoxide) and often food coloring (I believe green is best, but mixing green and purple makes a hideous and wonderful color called “ocky” that has a certain charm.) A complete recipe is here. You can also make it with other, non-borax compounds like cornstarch or laundry detergent.
Parents, if your kids are taking a break from their iPhones to do something fun and icky with their hands, let them enjoy themselves. It may get messy, and you don’t want them (or the dog, or even the cat) eating their homemade slime. But it’s pretty much harmless fun. Today’s lesson: don’t let the internet scare you.